Don’t Let Your Self Esteem Get Steamrolled!

steam roller self esteemHave you ever had a boss or person in authority think they are better than you? They try to trample your self esteem to make themselves feel better. I have had this happen several times, they momentarily ding my self-worth, but after thinking about it I always bounce back.

They fact is, these people actually have low self esteem themselves. It’s not always easy, but I usually fight back by trying to boost their self esteem. Generally when they see that I don’t crumple and remain positive they become an ally.

Long ago I decided that no one was better than me, simply because of their position, stature or social status. By the same token; I also work hard to remember that I’m no better than anyone else. We all determine our own self-worth!

Self esteem issues can be very difficult to detect because the wounds are internal. Although there is no visible scar, low self esteem can be very damaging for adults and children. But, the wonderful thing about self esteem is that it’s resilient, can be repaired and become stronger than ever.

Life optimization can restore and boost self esteem in our children, grand children and ourselves!dyk self esteem

“Children look to parents and other important adults for evidence that they’re lovable, smart, capable, etc. If they don’t get this evidence, low self-esteem develops.”
http://www.parenting-ed.org

When you look at newborn babies you can’t help but to marvel at their innocence and want to protect them from the world that they have entered.

We weren’t born with a low self esteem; it’s developed from our life experiences, and forms the basis of how we see ourselves. Unfortunately a major part of how we view ourselves is through the perspective of others.

When others knowingly or unknowingly put us down we make a mental note and the seeds of doubt are planted in our mind!

On a subconscious level, these negative thoughts eat away at our self esteem and over a period of time it can become completely eroded.  Our self esteem is slowly chipped away and eventually shapes who we become.

Self esteem issues can lead to health problems such as high blood pressure, irritable bowel syndrome, indigestion, heart disease, anorexia and other related illnesses.

Common Signs of Low Self Esteem

  • Warning Sign self esteemAggression towards other people as well as towards themselves
  • Constant negative self talk such as “I can’t do this” or “I won’t succeed” etc
  • Poor “concaved” posture
  • Negative opinions of others as well as themselves
  • Loners with limited socialization
  • Low participation in outdoor activities
  • In severe cases anorexia may be present
  • Blaming others for their problems
  • Short tempered, even on unimportant issues
  • Attempt to trample other’s self-esteem
  • Determined to get revenge for all perceived wrongs
  • Overly sensitive to criticism

Low self esteem can also lead to drug abuse, alcohol abuse, eating disorders, nervous breakdowns and even suicide. People that fall into this category need to seek professional help as they are unable to help themselves.

What Causes Low Self Esteem?

There are many factors that can lead to self esteem issues:

  • The death of a loved one
  • Being bullied at home, school or in the workplace
  • Personal loss
  • Any underlying psychological illness such as bipolar, ADD and others
  • Divorce
  • Poor finances
  • Severe health problems
  • Unemployment

Combating Low Self Esteem

Warrior training at the sunsetIn life optimization we learn that we can create our own reality and can program our mind to work to create that reality. The best way to combat low self esteem is through your thoughts. This goes for children and adults. Remember it’s never too late or too early to optimize your life!

We have complete power over our minds. This is known as personal power. Negative statements, thoughts or attitudes from other people really have no power over you. They can only impact your thoughts if you give them the power to.

Why would you give your personal power away?

Your personal power and inner thoughts help to determine what you think about yourself, which is what you ultimately become. It’s like the old proverb, “As a man thinketh, so is he”.

Your mind is exceptionally powerful and will take negative thoughts and make them a reality. But, it will also do the same for positive thoughts! Your self esteem really is in your hands.

This may be hard to believe, but it’s very important to teach it to your children and/or grandchildren as early as possible. You must truly believe that no one is better than you and let no one take away your personal power!

Boosting Self Esteem

Start by simply changing your posture, this has been proven to have a positive effect on your mood. Don’t believe me? Just try to be depressed when standing upright with a big grin on your face. Your facial muscles actually send messages to your brain. It signals the brain that you’re happy and are experiencing euphoria, and when your brain receives these positive signals it responds with happiness!

I’m sure you’ve heard that it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown!

Get in the habit of smiling! Practice smiling in front of a mirror, even when you don’t feel like it.  Soon smiling will become a habit, and will change the way others view and treat you. It will also change the way you view yourself!

Say or listen to positive affirmations daily. These positive statements will bombard your subconscious and eventually become your conscious thoughts.

Surround yourself with other positive people who can keep you motivated and you in turn can help to keep them motivated.

Let go of your past and don’t worry about your future. All we have is the present, so make the most of it. Remember, your past is not a preview of your future!

Set meaningful goals. Give yourself something to strive for and use your positive energy to achieve. For example if you want to lose 25 pounds, set sub-goals in 5 pound increments. Be sure to celebrate each time you lose 5 pounds!

Father and SonPositivity is contagious and people want to be around other positive people, because ultimately we all want to feel good about ourselves. Not only will you gain more friends that respect you and want to be around you, but you also feel good about yourself.

These tips will help you to change your thought process, which is the first step towards life optimization!

You can’t always control your circumstances, but you can control how you react to them. Realizing this is a very powerful thing and is how you grow and strengthen your personal power.

When you realize that you alone hold the key to your own happiness and nobody else, you will find more joy in life. You can make a difference, you were born for a reason and your life has value. You’re meant to be here, so become the optimal you that you’ve always wanted to be!

If you find it difficult to shake “the blues” or have bouts of depression and you can’t build up your self esteem no matter what you do, you should consider consulting a health professional right away. Also, don’t overlook nontraditional methods such as NLP (similar to hypnosis), EFT (tapping) and other spiritual healing resources.

Never be afraid to talk about it with loved ones, a problem shared is a problem half solved. Take back your personal power and put it to use!

How do you handle people who try to boost themselves up by putting you or others down?

Until next time,

bjg signature self esteem

 

 

barry@thepersonalizationlife.com

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